Week Number 4 (and counting): Toast!

Hard to believe, but it's been a friggin' month since I began my treatment. On one hand, it seems like "yesterday", on the other, it feels like for-e-v-e-r... Overall, Great! Physically, definitely becoming more of a challenge. Sometimes I feel like I got hit by the Energy Depletion Truck! And, as they said, the simple act of eating is becoming an awful lot like "Work" to me!....
I've got to maintain my weight and this means eating; that said, do you know what it's like to cut your food into tiny morsels and then very thoroughly and slowly, chew, chew, chew it and then --Gulp! Good luck in swallowing! Feels like the inside of my esophagus is "bruised" and after literally 2 swallow, I need to forceably rest and drink water and then wait until the feeling of "fullness" subsides, so that I can continue. Last night it took me approximately 45 minutes just to almost finish what was on my plate. Oh well, this too shall pass...

Thank goodness I haven't had to deal with "nausea" perse, however yesterday I was feeling extremely "queasy" which was relieved by gingerale and, I bought some chrystallized ginger from New Zealand at Whole Foods, which also helped...

Last night, I had some discomfort in lifting my head straight up from my pillow (my Left Neck area felt extremely muscularly fatigued--fkind of "sore" and "achey"--found it especially difficult to sleep on my right side (when I turned my head and put the right side on my pillow, the sense of "pressure" or "soreness" in my left neck was fairly uncomfortable. Lasted throughout the night. Reported this to my doctors today and they sent me to the hospital to have a "Port Study" conducted to make sure that the powerport which was inserted into my left chest wall right under the collarbone, was not blocked, etc (I guess they figured it might be related to the neck soreness as it's all in that area) Good news! No blockages, etc For whatever reason/reasons, they are not able to get a "backflow" of blood from my port--no difficulty in infusing me with the chemo, but alas, I may have to get used to being "stuck" for my blood work, instead of haveing them simply be able to access it via the port? We'll see...

Oh, guess what? I had tickets for a great Table Seat at Chastain Park tonight to go and see Stevie Wonder!!! I was really looking forward to it, however, judging from the way I felt yesterday, I felt there were too many "unknowns" and "variables" for me to want to deal with (energy, fatigue, being in crowds with a compromised immune system, plus the usually extremely long walks from the venue to parking, all in all, I decided to sell my seats to the lady who does my Radiation Therapy. All's well, that ends well! My "loss" is someone else's gain. that's cool!)

I'm really not trying to "complain" here, although that's probably exactly what the tone of this posting sounds like; I'm simply trying to reflect what the deal-i-o is and the simple reality is that this entire trip is like riding a great wave--parts of it just flow; parts are pure stagnant backwash!...

Good news, though... Week 4 is Toast!!! Bring it on, Bring it on, Bring it on. I truly want to go through whatever the hell I have to, one step at a time, and then, hopefully, step out of my own way and leave it all up to God!...

See Ya....

Vic