“Remember Mind; REMEMBER!”… Back to Basics
(This quote above is from The Ten Principal Upanishads)
As CEO of “Get Well, Inc.”, I now find myself faced with a choice. Since this is my blog, I can choose to write in whatsoever a manner I find pleasing. What I’ve decided, is to put down the mantle of “propriety” and stop saying what I think I should! Instead, I’m now going to venture a little farther out on the limb and simply speak from my heart with “Integrity”! No self-judgment—neither condemnation, nor praise—likewise no self-criticism nor approval seeking. As Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen, author of a fantastic book called “Kitchen Table Wisdom” says, for our lives to move forward and allow our life force to grow it is best to operate from our “Wholeness”… perceived warts and all, otherwise, the limiting space that arises between our spontaneous thought processes and our ensuing editorial judgments as to how to best present our thoughts, can actually be quite stifling (as far as letting our truth blossom)…
I recently sent the following “Progress Report out to about 75 people via email:
(This quote above is from The Ten Principal Upanishads)
As CEO of “Get Well, Inc.”, I now find myself faced with a choice. Since this is my blog, I can choose to write in whatsoever a manner I find pleasing. What I’ve decided, is to put down the mantle of “propriety” and stop saying what I think I should! Instead, I’m now going to venture a little farther out on the limb and simply speak from my heart with “Integrity”! No self-judgment—neither condemnation, nor praise—likewise no self-criticism nor approval seeking. As Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen, author of a fantastic book called “Kitchen Table Wisdom” says, for our lives to move forward and allow our life force to grow it is best to operate from our “Wholeness”… perceived warts and all, otherwise, the limiting space that arises between our spontaneous thought processes and our ensuing editorial judgments as to how to best present our thoughts, can actually be quite stifling (as far as letting our truth blossom)…
I recently sent the following “Progress Report out to about 75 people via email:
Got some "Good News" on Monday. Met with my Oncologist (the Chemo doc who's been coordinating everything). Basically, he reviewed all the tests of last week (the Endoscope on the 24th and the CT/PET Scan of the 25th). All the biopsies came back absolutely NEGATIVE, i..e., no signs of any cancer. That said, he then, of course, "hedged his bets" by saying that the lower walls of the esophogus remained somewhat narrowed and thickened, which could (and which I believe is the case) be due to the aftereffects of the radiation therapy, however it could also possibly be some residual tumer or cancer cells embedded in the esophogeal walls. Unfortunately, or whatever, the only way to know is to "cut it out" (i.e. Surgery) and examine it via a pathology report. This is the course that it seems like everybody, with the exception of Dr. Li, seem to want to follow as it does offer the greatest chances of full recovery and "cure".
So, while I cant absolutely say I am "Cancer Free", this is the best news that I could have gotten and all indications are as positive as they can be and I choose to attest to and affirm that "I Am Cancer FREE"!!!
I met with the Surgeon yesterday, Dr John E. Moore at St. Joseph's Hospital. As my goal, all along, ever since first discovering all this back on August 6, has been, and continues to be "Get all this behind me and then to move forward with my life, As Soon As Possible" I decided, after meeting with him and discussing all of it, and then being quiet for 10 minutes and asking Baba for an answer to the question "Should I go ahead and have this surgery and should I do it with this surgeon?" (the answer I heard was an immediate, "Yes... Yes... Yes"), I told him I decided to do this and to go ahead and schedule it ASAP. I'll find out pretty soon exactly when this will be; the best he was able to guestimate was "sometime in November/December". They have to coordinate 2 surgeons' schedules, etc., (a General Surgeon whom Dr Moore works with all the time who will be making an incision and removing part of my abdomen, hopefully as little as possible, and then Dr Moore would turn me onto my left side, make an incision in my right side, and remove what sounds like quite a sizable portion of my esophogus, he'd then pull what's remaining of my stomach up into my right chest, lay it against my spine and reattach via staple, the remaining ends of my stomach to my esophogus. The whole operation takes about 6 hours! It all sounded quite frightening and, in many regards, it was one of the scariest discussions I've ever participated in! While each individual is unique, and this includes their inner life force and healing abilities, he expects me to be in the ICU, possibly on a ventilator at the beginning, for up to a week and then in the Hospital for probably a total of 10 days to 2 weeks, during which time I'll be fed via feeding tubes, etc. He expects that it'll take up to 6 months to "recover" fully from the operation, i. e. to not only heal, but to regain my energy, etc.
I asked what are the "odds" if I elected Not to do the surgery, and he told me that the people who choose this course are looking at a 30% survivor rate, overall, without recurrence, etc. In fact, when I asked him this particular question, he gestured toward the door and told me that the gentleman in the room right across the hall, did exactly this. In 2006, he underwent Radiation and Chemo for esophogeal cancer, and from that time till now, (and no less than 5 subsequent endoscopies alll showed no evidence of cancer) until recently, when he cancer "came back"! Now, the ONLY option he has is surgery and the chances are "iffy"... Also, 5% of the people operated on develop a condition while in the hospital, I believe, where their lungs "weep" (sounds to me like they take on fluid and basically cant breathe) and they then die. I asked about mortality rates from this surgery (and here again, I'll take these odds!!!) I'm not sure if it's 8% or 12% overall who die--and this is from "all kinds of things", i.e., having heart attacks long after the surgery, etc.
Basically, it seems that the "best course and best practices according to the Western Medical community", seem to definitely point to surgery, if for no other reason than the only way they can be certain that there are no remaining cancer cells, is to do the surgery and then examine microscopically via pathology the removed tissue... (By the way, my brain CT Scan and my PET Scan all are excellent and do NOT show any additional traces of cancer in my body!)
Anyway, this is the latest I have to report! To sum it up... looks like one more, major, life-altering, hurdle and then, God Willing, "Let's keep on rockin' in the free world"!!!
Thanks for all your love, energy, support and prayers on my behalf!
KMLAAY
Victor
So, while I cant absolutely say I am "Cancer Free", this is the best news that I could have gotten and all indications are as positive as they can be and I choose to attest to and affirm that "I Am Cancer FREE"!!!
I met with the Surgeon yesterday, Dr John E. Moore at St. Joseph's Hospital. As my goal, all along, ever since first discovering all this back on August 6, has been, and continues to be "Get all this behind me and then to move forward with my life, As Soon As Possible" I decided, after meeting with him and discussing all of it, and then being quiet for 10 minutes and asking Baba for an answer to the question "Should I go ahead and have this surgery and should I do it with this surgeon?" (the answer I heard was an immediate, "Yes... Yes... Yes"), I told him I decided to do this and to go ahead and schedule it ASAP. I'll find out pretty soon exactly when this will be; the best he was able to guestimate was "sometime in November/December". They have to coordinate 2 surgeons' schedules, etc., (a General Surgeon whom Dr Moore works with all the time who will be making an incision and removing part of my abdomen, hopefully as little as possible, and then Dr Moore would turn me onto my left side, make an incision in my right side, and remove what sounds like quite a sizable portion of my esophogus, he'd then pull what's remaining of my stomach up into my right chest, lay it against my spine and reattach via staple, the remaining ends of my stomach to my esophogus. The whole operation takes about 6 hours! It all sounded quite frightening and, in many regards, it was one of the scariest discussions I've ever participated in! While each individual is unique, and this includes their inner life force and healing abilities, he expects me to be in the ICU, possibly on a ventilator at the beginning, for up to a week and then in the Hospital for probably a total of 10 days to 2 weeks, during which time I'll be fed via feeding tubes, etc. He expects that it'll take up to 6 months to "recover" fully from the operation, i. e. to not only heal, but to regain my energy, etc.
I asked what are the "odds" if I elected Not to do the surgery, and he told me that the people who choose this course are looking at a 30% survivor rate, overall, without recurrence, etc. In fact, when I asked him this particular question, he gestured toward the door and told me that the gentleman in the room right across the hall, did exactly this. In 2006, he underwent Radiation and Chemo for esophogeal cancer, and from that time till now, (and no less than 5 subsequent endoscopies alll showed no evidence of cancer) until recently, when he cancer "came back"! Now, the ONLY option he has is surgery and the chances are "iffy"... Also, 5% of the people operated on develop a condition while in the hospital, I believe, where their lungs "weep" (sounds to me like they take on fluid and basically cant breathe) and they then die. I asked about mortality rates from this surgery (and here again, I'll take these odds!!!) I'm not sure if it's 8% or 12% overall who die--and this is from "all kinds of things", i.e., having heart attacks long after the surgery, etc.
Basically, it seems that the "best course and best practices according to the Western Medical community", seem to definitely point to surgery, if for no other reason than the only way they can be certain that there are no remaining cancer cells, is to do the surgery and then examine microscopically via pathology the removed tissue... (By the way, my brain CT Scan and my PET Scan all are excellent and do NOT show any additional traces of cancer in my body!)
Anyway, this is the latest I have to report! To sum it up... looks like one more, major, life-altering, hurdle and then, God Willing, "Let's keep on rockin' in the free world"!!!
Thanks for all your love, energy, support and prayers on my behalf!
KMLAAY
Victor
Ok! That’s what I sent out… In perspective, I’d say that about 95% of the responses were extremely positive, wishing me well and promising to keep me in their prayers, and offering various forms of support! That’s the good news. The next day, I received no less than 4 communications of a “questioning” nature re my decision to proceed along the course I had set before me.
The first was from a dear friend who simply strongly suggested I get a second opinion before proceeding with something which was potentially so “life altering”… (Ostensibly, this certainly makes good sense, and if the shoe were on the other foot, I’d possibly/probably make a similar type suggestion myself!)…
The second one was from a “Healer” and woman whom I greatly respect and who, also, suggested a seek out a second opinion only this one with a “naturopath” (i.e., a person who works along an alternate path advocating good health via proper nutrition, like a raw food diet, etc.). This one, personally, did not resonate comfortably.
Then came the “humdinger”… The person who wrote it I truly love and respect. He sent me no less than 11 websites and/or places to go on the internet, strongly letting me know that I should hold off my pending course of action for at least 6 months and research it thoroughly and completely as this surgery was so highly invasive, complex, and potentially life altering/threatening, etc. He went on to give an example of how he had stopped a pending surgery on his wife’s foot the weekend prior to her surgery as he had discovered that other people who went through this were each in quite a bit of pain and discomfort, a couple of years after their operations, and whatever alternative course of action my friend chose to pursue, his wife is now fine and very comfortable in this regard! Implicit (and explicit) was his view that the particular surgeon in question was out to make a few bucks at his wife’s “expense”! By the way, this individual (my friend) was the former head of training for a huge Corporation which manufactures, among other medical products, defibrillators. He went on further to tell me that in his experience, having trained more than 3000 cardiac surgeons during his 25 year tenure with his company, that about 98% of this population seemed to have their—in my own words, here—hearts in their pocketbooks! Now remember, this is a friend of mine whom I feel very close to, and whose base of medical knowledge is certainly well beyond mine.
And lastly, a wonderful and life long friend of my family’s, an RN who was probably my wife’s closest and dearest friend ever since my family first moved to Georgia in 1983, and who currently works with these kinds of “Radical-Surgery-Patients” every day, began her conversation with me by questioning whether I was sure that this (my own upcoming surgery) was the correct thing for me to do!!! (To set the record absolutely straight, she did say that whatever I decided to do, that she would be support me in my decision and be there for me in whatever capacity I might require.)…
Well, now, I don’t know about you, dear reader, but to say that this boy was definitely “thrown for a loop”, is an understatement of “Biblical Proportions”! Every one of these well intentioned people’s own doubts and fears, began playing with and fogging up the mirror of my own mind, until they all coalesced into a cacophonous crescendo of confusion and uncertainty! Forget my own practices and disciplines of asking for and then going with my inner guidance; forget that the seeds of this course of action (the surgery that I am going to have) was planted in a totally straightforward and unambiguous fashion from day one by my own chemo and radiation oncologists; forget that I myself was expecting this from the get-go; all I know is that—let’s call it what it is—fear took over with every bit of its nagging power and seemingly occupied the conscious forefront of my heart and mind!
OK Sportsfans, lets flash forward! It’s now about a week since I sat and wrote the above. I’ve just returned from the “second opinion” by a surgeon who himself was diagnosed with throat cancer some 4 years prior. He absolutely concurred with my intended course of action and was even a bit more pessimistic as to the odds of my not having surgery and then experiencing a recurrence (The first surgeon said the odds were in the 30% category—i.e., only 30% of those electing to forego surgery would not have a recurrence, whereas this second doctor said that he thought the odds were actually closer to about only 20% of those electing to take a “surgical pass” would not experience a recurrence. While I realize that “statistics can be one of the largest sources of lies known to man” I still find these ratios powerfully compelling!
I also have to realize that regardless of anybody else’s concerns and loving and good intentions for my wellbeing, that each person out there views the world through their own filters and perceptions and that their “dream” is no more “real” than is “mine”! (Actually, for me myself, my own “dream” is what I must learn to honor, believe in, and ultimately, live!)
I am reminded of a Toltec wisdom book called “The Four Agreements”. In it, the author, Don Miguel Ruiz perceives “reality” from a heightened state of awareness and then relates that each of us perceives the world from our own limited point of view; actually, he says that each of us, in an unlimited state of awareness are like “shining mirrors” simply reflecting the light (or Universal Consciousness) and that when we return to our “normal” state of awareness, that our mirrors become covered with a coating or substance which substantially alters the light that we can then reflect. He says that we each live in our own “dream”, and therefore, the “third” agreement is: “Never take anything that anyone else says, or does, personally” , (as their perception is simply that individual’s “own dream”—valid for themselves, no doubt, but not necessarily valid for anyone else! Thus, it seems to me that part of my present work is for me to simply remember the following:
The first was from a dear friend who simply strongly suggested I get a second opinion before proceeding with something which was potentially so “life altering”… (Ostensibly, this certainly makes good sense, and if the shoe were on the other foot, I’d possibly/probably make a similar type suggestion myself!)…
The second one was from a “Healer” and woman whom I greatly respect and who, also, suggested a seek out a second opinion only this one with a “naturopath” (i.e., a person who works along an alternate path advocating good health via proper nutrition, like a raw food diet, etc.). This one, personally, did not resonate comfortably.
Then came the “humdinger”… The person who wrote it I truly love and respect. He sent me no less than 11 websites and/or places to go on the internet, strongly letting me know that I should hold off my pending course of action for at least 6 months and research it thoroughly and completely as this surgery was so highly invasive, complex, and potentially life altering/threatening, etc. He went on to give an example of how he had stopped a pending surgery on his wife’s foot the weekend prior to her surgery as he had discovered that other people who went through this were each in quite a bit of pain and discomfort, a couple of years after their operations, and whatever alternative course of action my friend chose to pursue, his wife is now fine and very comfortable in this regard! Implicit (and explicit) was his view that the particular surgeon in question was out to make a few bucks at his wife’s “expense”! By the way, this individual (my friend) was the former head of training for a huge Corporation which manufactures, among other medical products, defibrillators. He went on further to tell me that in his experience, having trained more than 3000 cardiac surgeons during his 25 year tenure with his company, that about 98% of this population seemed to have their—in my own words, here—hearts in their pocketbooks! Now remember, this is a friend of mine whom I feel very close to, and whose base of medical knowledge is certainly well beyond mine.
And lastly, a wonderful and life long friend of my family’s, an RN who was probably my wife’s closest and dearest friend ever since my family first moved to Georgia in 1983, and who currently works with these kinds of “Radical-Surgery-Patients” every day, began her conversation with me by questioning whether I was sure that this (my own upcoming surgery) was the correct thing for me to do!!! (To set the record absolutely straight, she did say that whatever I decided to do, that she would be support me in my decision and be there for me in whatever capacity I might require.)…
Well, now, I don’t know about you, dear reader, but to say that this boy was definitely “thrown for a loop”, is an understatement of “Biblical Proportions”! Every one of these well intentioned people’s own doubts and fears, began playing with and fogging up the mirror of my own mind, until they all coalesced into a cacophonous crescendo of confusion and uncertainty! Forget my own practices and disciplines of asking for and then going with my inner guidance; forget that the seeds of this course of action (the surgery that I am going to have) was planted in a totally straightforward and unambiguous fashion from day one by my own chemo and radiation oncologists; forget that I myself was expecting this from the get-go; all I know is that—let’s call it what it is—fear took over with every bit of its nagging power and seemingly occupied the conscious forefront of my heart and mind!
OK Sportsfans, lets flash forward! It’s now about a week since I sat and wrote the above. I’ve just returned from the “second opinion” by a surgeon who himself was diagnosed with throat cancer some 4 years prior. He absolutely concurred with my intended course of action and was even a bit more pessimistic as to the odds of my not having surgery and then experiencing a recurrence (The first surgeon said the odds were in the 30% category—i.e., only 30% of those electing to forego surgery would not have a recurrence, whereas this second doctor said that he thought the odds were actually closer to about only 20% of those electing to take a “surgical pass” would not experience a recurrence. While I realize that “statistics can be one of the largest sources of lies known to man” I still find these ratios powerfully compelling!
I also have to realize that regardless of anybody else’s concerns and loving and good intentions for my wellbeing, that each person out there views the world through their own filters and perceptions and that their “dream” is no more “real” than is “mine”! (Actually, for me myself, my own “dream” is what I must learn to honor, believe in, and ultimately, live!)
I am reminded of a Toltec wisdom book called “The Four Agreements”. In it, the author, Don Miguel Ruiz perceives “reality” from a heightened state of awareness and then relates that each of us perceives the world from our own limited point of view; actually, he says that each of us, in an unlimited state of awareness are like “shining mirrors” simply reflecting the light (or Universal Consciousness) and that when we return to our “normal” state of awareness, that our mirrors become covered with a coating or substance which substantially alters the light that we can then reflect. He says that we each live in our own “dream”, and therefore, the “third” agreement is: “Never take anything that anyone else says, or does, personally” , (as their perception is simply that individual’s “own dream”—valid for themselves, no doubt, but not necessarily valid for anyone else! Thus, it seems to me that part of my present work is for me to simply remember the following:
I’ve got my own dreams from, and in which, to view the world!
Interesting, but I just received another email from the woman I referred to above—the healer who suggested that I seek out a naturopath for a 2nd opinion. Now you’ve got to understand, I really believe that this is a lady of great intelligence and wisdom, and whose words, and views, I truly admire and respect. However, Not for Me and Not in My Case!!!
Following is part of her email:
Following is part of her email:
I must tell you that I would prefer to see you take six months and make the lifestyle, emotional and thinking changes that will support a cancer-free body rather than have that surgery. If you don’t do those things, the cancer is likely to come back after your surgery. Tell the doctors you want to do “watchful waiting.” What would Sai Baba say?
My response:
(Name withheld), First of all, I think you know that I am deeply respectful of your wisdom and being, and truly honor the "testament" that you are to what you have achieved with your own healing.
That said, as we are all different, all that each of us can do is get in touch with his or her own self; get quiet, meditate, pray, etc., and then decide what is best for our own selves. As for me, after a period of weighing all kinds of factors, I've come to a decision which is different from what it is that you are saying you'd prefer that I do. I've spent a great deal of time ever since first becoming aware of this condition back in August, in working as best I know how, along with loving guidance and prayers, etc., from a great deal of people (yourself certainly included in these), to guard my thinking, to be centered and truly live in each present moment (where Presence lives and fear does not); while I haven't become a "raw food exclusive" eater, my diet has changed considerably towards the "healthy", and I've sought Spiritual guidance from a number of respected sources, and taken from each of these that which has resonated as comfortable and valid for me, and tried as best I know how to incorporate this into my "daily routine". I believe, over all, I am a better person as a result!
Yesterday, I sat for a 2nd opinion from a chemo oncologist at Piedmont Hospital, who had himself been diagnosed, 4 years ago, with throat cancer. While this is certainly different from what it is that I have, he was even more "pessimistic" about the "odds" of surviving long term without recurrence should I elect to not have the surgery. (My own surgeon told me around 30% of people who don't have surgery and have esophogeal cancer are ok--meaning that 70% have a recurrence; this new doctor said he'd suspect that the odds were really closer to only 20%!)
All along, one of my stated main goals in this journey, has been to do whatever necessary in order to "get this all behind me as quickly as possible, so that I could then get on with the rest of my life, also as quickly as possible!" While a 6 month hiatus doesn't sound "long" from a "remainder of my life" perspective, from the space-time frame of reference of "what I've been through and what I'm presently going through" it feels "too long" for me. (There are also practical matters such as economics--i.e., I'd need to return to work which would jeopardize the disability income that I'm currently receiving). As far as “what would Sai Baba say?”: While I certainly cannot claim to "speak for him", I believe that I did hear him very clearly when I became silent and asked him the following question:
"Swami! Should I have this surgery, and should I have it with this surgeon?".
(By the way, I've done this particular exercise—I’m not sure but I'd guestimate that it's been around slightly less than a total of 10 times throughout my life—and what I can say with "hindsight being 20-20”, and absolute certainty, is that each time I did this, the answer I received was 100% True and that furthermore, this practice has "Never let me down!") The answer that I heard to this specific question was an extremely clear, "Yes! Yes! Yes!”)
(Name withheld), while I deeply appreciate your concerns and your wishes, I believe that in the past (and I forget what the context was) you said something to the effect that whereas some course of action might not be the one that would work for you that the being who made that decision was to be honored. (Remember now, I'm probably taking liberties in paraphrasing you here, but my point, I believe, will resonate with you.) So, while you would apparently choose a very different course of action, I'd sincerely hope that you'd honor whatever course I may choose for myself that would be comfortable for me; and, if possible, that you would continue to send me all of your love and support for "the perceived reality of my own being and my own journey"...
Also, during the approximately 6 months that it'll take for me to heal and recover from the surgery, I don't see why I couldn't use this period of time to "make the lifestyle, emotional and thinking changes that will support a cancer-free body"?
Belive me, (Name withheld), while I do appreciate your concerns, very honestly, what I need in my life now, are those people who, because of their love for me, can/will love and support me in my own health decisions, even though they may differ from their own.
Thank you again for everything that you've already done for me and on my behalf, and I sincerely hope that you'll be there for me in the same capacity going forward!
I love you very much, and thanks again!
Victor
That said, as we are all different, all that each of us can do is get in touch with his or her own self; get quiet, meditate, pray, etc., and then decide what is best for our own selves. As for me, after a period of weighing all kinds of factors, I've come to a decision which is different from what it is that you are saying you'd prefer that I do. I've spent a great deal of time ever since first becoming aware of this condition back in August, in working as best I know how, along with loving guidance and prayers, etc., from a great deal of people (yourself certainly included in these), to guard my thinking, to be centered and truly live in each present moment (where Presence lives and fear does not); while I haven't become a "raw food exclusive" eater, my diet has changed considerably towards the "healthy", and I've sought Spiritual guidance from a number of respected sources, and taken from each of these that which has resonated as comfortable and valid for me, and tried as best I know how to incorporate this into my "daily routine". I believe, over all, I am a better person as a result!
Yesterday, I sat for a 2nd opinion from a chemo oncologist at Piedmont Hospital, who had himself been diagnosed, 4 years ago, with throat cancer. While this is certainly different from what it is that I have, he was even more "pessimistic" about the "odds" of surviving long term without recurrence should I elect to not have the surgery. (My own surgeon told me around 30% of people who don't have surgery and have esophogeal cancer are ok--meaning that 70% have a recurrence; this new doctor said he'd suspect that the odds were really closer to only 20%!)
All along, one of my stated main goals in this journey, has been to do whatever necessary in order to "get this all behind me as quickly as possible, so that I could then get on with the rest of my life, also as quickly as possible!" While a 6 month hiatus doesn't sound "long" from a "remainder of my life" perspective, from the space-time frame of reference of "what I've been through and what I'm presently going through" it feels "too long" for me. (There are also practical matters such as economics--i.e., I'd need to return to work which would jeopardize the disability income that I'm currently receiving). As far as “what would Sai Baba say?”: While I certainly cannot claim to "speak for him", I believe that I did hear him very clearly when I became silent and asked him the following question:
"Swami! Should I have this surgery, and should I have it with this surgeon?".
(By the way, I've done this particular exercise—I’m not sure but I'd guestimate that it's been around slightly less than a total of 10 times throughout my life—and what I can say with "hindsight being 20-20”, and absolute certainty, is that each time I did this, the answer I received was 100% True and that furthermore, this practice has "Never let me down!") The answer that I heard to this specific question was an extremely clear, "Yes! Yes! Yes!”)
(Name withheld), while I deeply appreciate your concerns and your wishes, I believe that in the past (and I forget what the context was) you said something to the effect that whereas some course of action might not be the one that would work for you that the being who made that decision was to be honored. (Remember now, I'm probably taking liberties in paraphrasing you here, but my point, I believe, will resonate with you.) So, while you would apparently choose a very different course of action, I'd sincerely hope that you'd honor whatever course I may choose for myself that would be comfortable for me; and, if possible, that you would continue to send me all of your love and support for "the perceived reality of my own being and my own journey"...
Also, during the approximately 6 months that it'll take for me to heal and recover from the surgery, I don't see why I couldn't use this period of time to "make the lifestyle, emotional and thinking changes that will support a cancer-free body"?
Belive me, (Name withheld), while I do appreciate your concerns, very honestly, what I need in my life now, are those people who, because of their love for me, can/will love and support me in my own health decisions, even though they may differ from their own.
Thank you again for everything that you've already done for me and on my behalf, and I sincerely hope that you'll be there for me in the same capacity going forward!
I love you very much, and thanks again!
Victor
Again, all I can do is to view the world as I will and then to refer to it from my own “integrity”! May the Loving Lord of All The Worlds bless and love me, you, and everyone!
OM
Loka Samastha, Sukino Bhavantu,
Loka Samastha, Sukino Bhavantu,
Loka Samastha, Sukino Bhavantu,
Om, Shanthi, Shanthi, Shanthi!
Translation:
“May All The Beings, In All The Worlds, Always Be Happy,
Peace… Peace… Peace…”
So then, as I said earlier, “Back to Basics”: My present work is to focus on the following:
1) I Am “That” I Am…
2) The only “Reality” is This Present Moment, “The Eternal NOW”…
3) My current full-time job, consists simply of being conscious and “Remembering
Number 2”!...
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